Earlier text: PUBLISHING AND TRAVELING.NOTWITHSTANDING the labors, cares, and responsibilities with which my husband’s life had been crowded, his sixtieth year found him active and vigorous in mind and body. Three times had he fallen under a stroke of paralysis; yet by the blessing of God, a naturally strong constitution, and strict attention to the laws of health, he had been enabled to rally. Again he traveled, preached, and wrote with his wonted zeal and energy. Side by side we had labored in the cause of Christ for thirty-six years; and we hoped that we might stand together to witness the triumphant close. But such was not the will of God. The chosen protector of my youth, the,106 companion of my life, the sharer of my labors and afflictions, has been taken from my side, and I am left to finish my work and to fight the battle alone. The spring and early summer of 1881 we spent together at our home in Battle Creek. My husband hoped to arrange his business so that we could go to the Pacific coast and devote ourselves to writing. He felt that we had made a mistake in allowing the apparent wants of the cause and the entreaties of our brethren to urge us into active labor in preaching when we should have been writing. My husband desired to present more fully the glorious subject of Redemption, and I had long contemplated the preparation of important books. We both felt that while our mental powers were unimpaired we should complete these works,—that it was a duty which we owed to ourselves and to the cause of God to rest from the heat of battle, and give to our people the precious light of truth which God had opened to our minds. Some weeks before the death of my husband, I urged upon him the importance of seeking a field of labor where we would be released from the burdens necessarily coming upon us at Battle Creek. In reply he spoke of various matters which required attention before we could leave,—duties which some one must do. Then with deep feeling he inquired, “Where are the men to do this work? Where are those who will have an unselfish interest in our institutions, and who will stand for the right, unaffected by any influence with which they may come in contact?” With tears he expressed his anxiety for our institutions at Battle Creek. Said he, “My life has been given to the upbuilding of these institutions. It seems like death to leave them. They are as my children, and I cannot separate my interest from them. These institutions are the Lord’s instrumentalities to do a specific work. Satan seeks to hinder and defeat every means by which the Lord is working107 for the salvation of men. If the great adversary can mold these institutions according to the world’s standard, his object is gained. It is my greatest anxiety to have the right man in the right place. If those who stand in responsible positions are weak in moral power, and vacillating in principle, inclined to lead toward the world, there are enough who will be led. Evil influences must not prevail. I would rather die than live to see these institutions mismanaged, or turned aside from the purpose for which they were brought into existence. “In my relations to this cause I have been longest and most closely connected with the publishing work. Three times have I fallen, stricken with paralysis, through my devotion to this branch of the cause. Now that God has given me renewed physical and mental strength, I feel that I can serve his cause as I have never been able to serve it before. I must see the publishing work prosper. It is interwoven with my very existence. If I forget the interests of this work, let my right hand forget her cunning.” We had an appointment to attend a tent-meeting at Charlotte, Sabbath and Sunday, July 23 and 24. As I was in feeble health, we decided to travel by private conveyance. On the way, my husband seemed cheerful, yet a feeling of solemnity rested upon him. He repeatedly praised the Lord for mercies and blessings received, and freely expressed his own feelings concerning the past and future: “The Lord is good, and greatly to be praised. He is a present help in time of need. The future seems cloudy and uncertain, but the Lord would not have us distressed over these things. When trouble comes, he will give us grace to endure it. What the Lord has been to us, and what he has done for us, should make us so grateful that we would never murmur or complain. Our labors, burdens, and sacrifices will never be fully appreciated by all. I see that I have lost my peace of mind and the blessing of God by permitting myself to be troubled by these things.” “It has seemed hard to me that my motives should be misjudged, and that my best efforts to help, encourage, and strengthen my brethren should again and again be turned against me. But I should have remembered Jesus and his disappointments. His soul was grieved that he was not appreciated by those he came to bless. I should have dwelt upon the mercy and loving-kindness of God, praising him more, and complaining less of the ingratitude of my brethren. Had I ever left all my perplexities with the Lord, thinking less of what others said and did against me, I should have had more peace and joy. I will now seek first to guard myself that I offend not in word or deed, and then to help my brethren make straight paths for their feet. I will not stop to mourn over any wrong done to me. I have expected more of men than I ought. I love God and his work, and I love my brethren also.” Little did I think, as we traveled on, that this was the last journey we would ever make together. The weather changed suddenly from oppressive heat to chilling cold. My husband took cold, but thought his health so good that he would receive no permanent injury. He labored in the meetings at Charlotte, presenting the truth with great clearness and power. He spoke of the pleasure he felt in addressing a people who manifested so deep an interest in the subjects most dear to him. “The Lord has indeed refreshed my soul,” he said, “while I have been breaking to others the bread of life. All over Michigan the people are calling eagerly for help. How I long to comfort, encourage, and strengthen them with the precious truths applicable to this time!” On our return home, my husband complained of slight indisposition, yet he engaged in his work as usual. Every morning we visited the grove near our home, and united in prayer. We were anxious to know our duty. Letters were continually coming in from different places, urging us to attend the camp-meetings. Notwithstanding our determination to109 devote ourselves to writing, it was hard to refuse to meet with our brethren in these important gatherings. We earnestly pleaded for wisdom to know the right course. Sabbath morning, as usual, we went to the grove together, and my husband prayed most fervently three times. He seemed reluctant to cease pleading with God for special guidance and blessing. His prayers were heard, and peace and light came to our hearts. He praised the Lord, and said, “Now I give it all up to Jesus. I feel a sweet, heavenly peace, an assurance that the Lord will show us our duty; for we desire to do his will.” He accompanied me to the Tabernacle, and opened the services with singing and prayer. It was the last time he was ever to stand by my side in the pulpit. On the following Monday he had a severe chill, and the next day I too was attacked. Together we were taken to the Sanitarium for treatment. On Friday my symptoms became more favorable. The doctor then informed me that my husband was inclined to sleep, and that danger was apprehended. I was immediately taken to his room, and as soon as I looked upon his countenance I knew that he was dying. I tried to arouse him. He understood all that was said to him, and responded to all questions that could be answered by yes or no, but seemed unable to say more. When I told him I thought he was dying, he manifested no surprise. I asked if Jesus was precious to him. He said, “Yes, oh yes.” “Have you no desire to live?” I inquired. He answered, “No.” We then knelt by his bedside, and I prayed for him. A peaceful expression rested upon his countenance. I said to him, “Jesus loves you. The everlasting arms are beneath you.” He responded, “Yes, yes.” Brother Smith and other brethren then prayed around his bedside, and retired to spend much of the night in prayer. My husband said he felt no pain; but he was evidently failing fast. Dr. Kellogg and110 his helpers did all that was in their power to hold him back from death. He slowly revived, but continued very weak. The next morning he seemed slightly to revive, but about noon he had a chill, which left him unconscious. At 5 P.M., Sabbath, August 6, 1881, he quietly breathed his life away, without a struggle or a groan. The shock of my husband’s death—so sudden, so unexpected—fell upon me with crushing weight. In my feeble condition I had summoned strength to remain at his bedside to the last, but when I saw his eyes closed in death, exhausted nature gave way, and I was completely prostrated. For some time I seemed balancing between life and death. The vital flame burned so low that a breath might extinguish it. At night my pulse would grow feeble, and my breathing fainter and fainter till it seemed about to cease. Only by the blessing of God and the unremitting care and watchfulness of physician and attendants was my life preserved. Though I had not risen from my sick-bed after my husband’s death, I was borne to the Tabernacle on the following Sabbath to attend his funeral. At the close of the sermon I felt it a duty to testify to the value of the Christian’s hope in the hour of sorrow and bereavement. As I arose, strength was given me, and I spoke about ten minutes, exalting the mercy and love of God in the presence of that crowded assembly. At the close of the services I followed my husband to Oak Hill Cemetery, where he was laid to rest until the morning of the resurrection. My physical strength had been prostrated by the blow, yet the power of divine grace sustained me in my great bereavement. When I saw my husband breathe his last, I felt that Jesus was more precious to me then than he ever had been in any previous hour of my life. When I stood by my firstborn, and closed his eyes in death, I could say, “The Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” And I felt then that I had a111 comforter in Jesus. And when my latest born was torn from my arms, and I could no longer see its little head upon the pillow by my side, then I could say, “The Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” And when he upon whose large affections I had leaned, with whom I had labored for thirty-six years, was taken away, I could lay my hands upon his eyes, and say, I commit my treasure to Thee until the morning of the resurrection. When I saw him passing away, and saw the many friends sympathizing with me, I thought, What a contrast to the death of Jesus as he hung upon the cross! What a contrast! In the hour of his agony, the revilers were mocking and deriding him. But he died, and he passed through the tomb to brighten it, and to lighten it, that we might have joy and hope even in the event of death; that we might say, as we lay our friends away to rest in Jesus, We shall meet them again. At times I felt that I could not have my husband die. But these words seemed to be impressed on my mind: “Be still, and know that I am God.” I keenly feel my loss, but dare not give myself up to useless grief. This would not bring back the dead. And I am not so selfish as to wish, if I could, to bring him from his peaceful slumber to engage again in the battles of life. Like a tired warrior, he has lain down to sleep. I will look with pleasure upon his resting-place. The best way in which I and my children can honor the memory of him who has fallen, is to take the work where he left it, and in the strength of Jesus carry it forward to completion. We will be thankful for the years of usefulness that were granted to him; and for his sake, and for Christ’s sake, we will learn from his death a lesson which we shall never forget. We will let this bereavement make us more kind and gentle, more forbearing, patient, and thoughtful toward the living. I take up my life-work alone, in full confidence112 that my Redeemer will be with me. We have only a little while to wage the warfare; then Christ will come, and this scene of conflict will close. Then our last efforts will have been made to work with Christ, and advance his kingdom. Some who have stood in the fore-front of the battle, zealously resisting incoming evil, fall at the post of duty; the living gaze sorrowfully at the fallen heroes, but there is no time to cease work. They must close up the ranks; seize the banner from the hand palsied by death, and with renewed energy vindicate the truth and the honor of Christ. As never before, resistance must be made against sin—against the powers of darkness. The time demands energetic and determined activity on the part of those who believe present truth. If the time seems long to wait for our Deliverer to come; if, bowed by affliction and worn with toil, we feel impatient to receive an honorable release from the warfare, let us remember—and let the remembrance check every murmur—that we are left on earth to encounter storms and conflicts, to perfect Christian character, to become better acquainted with God our Father, and Christ our elder Brother, and to do work for the Master in winning many souls to Christ. “They that be wise shall shine as the firmament; and they that turn many to righteousness, as the stars forever and ever.” TESTIMONY FOR THE CHURCH.
November 20, 1855, while in prayer, the Spirit of the Lord came suddenly and powerfully upon me, and I was taken off in vision. I saw that the Spirit of the Lord has been dying away from the church. The servants of the Lord have trusted too much to the strength of argument, and have not had that firm reliance upon God which they should have. I saw that the mere argument of the truth will not move souls to take a stand with the remnant; for the truth is unpopular. The servants of God must have the truth in the soul. Said the angel, “They must get it warm from glory, carry it in their bosoms, and pour it out in the warmth and earnestness of the soul to those that hear.” A few that are conscientious are ready to decide from the weight of evidence; but it is impossible to move many with a mere theory of the truth. There must be a power to attend the truth, a living testimony to move them. I saw that the enemy is busy to destroy souls. Exaltation has come into the ranks; there must be more humility. There is too much of an independence of spirit indulged in among the messengers. This must be laid aside, and there must be a drawing together of the servants of God. There has been too much of a spirit to ask, “Am I my brother’s keeper?”114 Said the angel, “Yea, thou art thy brother’s keeper. Thou shouldst have a watchful care for thy brother, be interested for his welfare, and cherish a kind, loving spirit toward him. Press together, press together.” God designed that man should be open-hearted and honest, without affectation, meek, humble, with simplicity. This is the principle of Heaven; God ordered it so. But poor, frail man has sought out something different,—to follow his own way, and carefully attend to his own self-interest. I asked the angel why simplicity had been shut out from the church, and pride and exaltation had come in. I saw that this is the reason why we have almost been delivered into the hand of the enemy. Said the angel, “Look ye, and ye shall see that this feeling prevails, Am I my brother’s keeper?” Again said the angel, “Thou art thy brother’s keeper. Thy profession, thy faith, requires thee to deny thyself and sacrifice to God, or thou wilt be unworthy of eternal life; for it was purchased for thee dearly, even by the agony, the sufferings, and blood of the beloved Son of God.” I saw that many in different places, East and West, were adding farm to farm, and land to land, and house to house, and they make the cause of God their excuse, saying they do this that they may help the cause. They shackle themselves so that they can be of but little benefit to the cause. Some buy a piece of land, and labor with all their might to pay for it. Their time is so occupied that they can spare but little time to pray, and serve God, and gain strength from him to overcome their besetments. They are in debt, and when the cause needs their help they cannot assist; for they must get free from debt first. But as soon as they are free from debt they are farther from helping the cause than before; for they again involve themselves by adding to their property. They flatter themselves that this course is right, that they will use the avails in the cause, when they are actually laying up treasure here. They love the115 truth in word, but not in work. They love the cause just as much as their works show. They love the world more, and the cause of God less; the attraction to earth grows stronger, and the attraction to Heaven weaker. Their heart is with their treasure. By their example they say to those around them that they are intending to stay here, that this world is their home. Said the angel, “Thou art thy brother’s keeper.” Many have indulged in needless expense, merely to gratify the feelings, the taste, and the eye, when the cause needed the very means thus used, and when some of the servants of God were poorly clothed, and were crippled in their labor for lack of means. Said the angel, “Their time to do will soon be past. Their works show that self is their idol, and to it they sacrifice.” Self must first be gratified; their feeling is, “Am I my brother’s keeper?” Warning after warning many have received, but heeded not. Self is the main object, and to it everything must bow. I saw that the church has nearly lost the spirit of self-denial and sacrifice; they make self and self-interest first, and then they do for the cause what they think they can as well as not. Such a sacrifice, I saw, is lame, and not accepted of God. All should be interested to do their utmost to advance the cause. I saw that those who have no property, but have strength of body, are accountable to God for their strength. They should be diligent in business and fervent in spirit; they should not leave those that have possessions to do all the sacrificing. I saw that they can sacrifice, and that it is their duty to do so, as well as those who have property. But often those that have no possessions do not realize that they can deny themselves in many ways, can lay out less upon their bodies, and to gratify their tastes and appetites, and find much to spare for the cause, and thus lay up a treasure in Heaven. I saw that there is loveliness and beauty in the truth; but take away the power of God, and it is powerless. TIME TO BEGIN THE SABBATH.
I saw that it is even so, “From even unto even shall ye celebrate your Sabbaths.” Said the angel, “Take the word of God, read it, understand, and ye cannot err. Read carefully, and ye shall there find what even is, and when it is.” I asked the angel if the frown of God had been upon his people for commencing the Sabbath as they had. I was directed back to the first rise of the Sabbath, and followed the people of God up to this time, but did not see that the Lord was displeased, or frowned upon them. I inquired why it had been thus, that at this late day we must change the time of commencing the Sabbath. Said the angel, “Ye shall understand, but not yet, not yet.” Said the angel, “If light come, and that light is set aside or rejected, then comes condemnation and the frown of God; but before the light comes, there is no sin, for there is no light for them to reject.” I saw that it was in the minds of some that the Lord had shown that the Sabbath commenced at six o’clock, when I had only seen that it commenced at “even,” and it was inferred that even was at six. I saw that the servants of God must draw together, press together. I was shown the case of Stephenson and Hall, of Wisconsin. I saw that while we were in Wisconsin, in June, 1854, they were convicted that the visions were of God; but they examined them and compared them with their views of the age to come, and because the visions did not agree with these, they sacrificed the visions for the Age-to-Come. And while on their journey East, last spring, they both were wrong and designing. They have stumbled over the Age-to-Come, and they are ready to take any course to injure117 the Review; its friends must be awake and do what they can to save the children of God from deception. These men are uniting with a lying and corrupt people. They have had evidence of this. And while they were professing sympathy and union with my husband, they (especially Stephenson) were biting like an adder behind his back. While their words were smooth with him, they were inflaming Wisconsin against the Review and its conductors. Especially was Stephenson active in this matter. Their object has been to have the Review publish the Age-to-Come theory, or to destroy its influence. And while my husband was open-hearted and unsuspecting, seeking ways to remove their jealousy, and frankly opening to them the affairs of the Office, and trying to help them, they were watching for evil, and observing everything with a jealous eye. Said the angel as I beheld them, “Think ye, feeble man, that ye can stay the work of God! Feeble man, one touch of his finger can lay thee prostrate. He will suffer thee but a little while.” I was pointed back to the rise of the advent doctrine, and even before that time, and saw that there had not been a parallel to the deception, misrepresentation, and falsehood that has been practiced by the Messenger party, or such an association of corrupt hearts under a cloak of religion. Some honest hearts have been influenced by them, concluding that they must have at least some cause for their statements, thinking them incapable of uttering so glaring falsehoods. I saw that such will have evidence of the truth of these matters. The church of God should move straight along, as though there were not such a people in the world. I saw that decided efforts should be made to show those who are unchristian in life their wrongs, and if they do not reform, they should be separated from the precious and holy, that God may have a clean and pure people that he can delight in. Dishonor118 him not by linking or uniting the clean with the unclean. I was shown some coming from the East to the West. I saw that it should not be the object of those who leave the East for the West to get rich, but to win souls to the truth. Said the angel, “Let your works show that it is not for honor, or to lay up a treasure on earth, that ye have moved West, but to hold up and exalt the standard of truth.” I saw that those who move West should be like men waiting for their Lord. Said the angel, “Be a living example to those in the West. Let your works show that you are God’s peculiar people, and that you have a peculiar work, to give the last message of mercy to the world. Let your works show to those around you that this world is not your home.” I saw that those who have entangled themselves should break the snare of the enemy and go free. Lay not up treasures upon earth, but show by your lives that you are laying up treasure in Heaven. If God has called you West, he has a work, an exalted work, for you to do. Let your faith and experience help those who have not a living experience. Let not the attraction be to this poor, dark speck of a world, but let it be upward to God, glory, and Heaven. Let not the care and perplexity of farms here engross your mind, but you can safely be wrapt up in contemplating Abraham’s farm. We are heirs to that immortal inheritance. Wean your affections from earth, and dwell upon heavenly things. I saw that great responsibility rests upon parents. They must not be led by their children, but must lead them. I was referred to Abraham. He was faithful in his house. He commanded his household after him, and it was remembered of God. I was then referred to the case of Eli. He restrained not his children, and they became wicked and vile, and by their wickedness, led Israel astray. When God had made known to Samuel their sins, and the heavy curse that was to follow because Eli restrained them not, he said that their sins should not be purged with sacrifice nor offering forever. When told by Samuel what the Lord had shown him, Eli submitted, saying, “It is the Lord, let him do what seemeth him good.” The curse of God soon followed. Those wicked priests were slain, and thirty thousand of Israel were also slain, and the ark of God was taken by their enemies. And when Eli heard that the ark of God was taken, he fell backward and died. All this evil resulted from Eli’s neglect to restrain his sons. I saw that if God was so particular as to notice such things anciently, he will be no less particular in these last days. Parents must govern their children, correct their passions, and subdue them, or God will surely destroy the children in the day of his fierce anger, and the parents who have not controlled their children will not be blameless. Especially should the servants of God govern their own families, and have them in good subjection. I saw that they are not prepared to judge or decide in matters of the church, unless they can rule well their own house. They must first have order at home, and then their judgment and influence will tell in the church. I saw that the reason why visions have not been more frequent of late, is, they have not been appreciated by the church. The church have nearly lost their spirituality and faith, and the reproofs and warnings have had but little effect upon them. Many of those who have professed faith in them, have not heeded them. Some have taken an injudicious course; when they have talked their faith to unbelievers, and the proof has been asked for, they have read a vision, instead of going to the Bible for proof. I saw that this course was inconsistent, and prejudiced unbelievers120 against the truth. The visions can have no weight with those who have never seen them, and know nothing of their spirit. They should not be referred to in such cases. When at Battle Creek, Mich., May 5, 1855, I saw that there was a great lack of faith with the servants of God, as well as with the church. They were too easily discouraged, too ready to doubt God, too willing to believe that they had a hard lot, and that God had forsaken them. I saw that this was cruel. God so loved them as to give his dearly beloved Son to die for them, and all Heaven was interested in their salvation; yet after all that had been done for them, it was hard to believe and trust so kind and good a Father. He has said that he is more willing to give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him, than earthly parents are to give good gifts to their children. I saw that the servants of God and the church were too easily discouraged. When they asked their Father in Heaven for things which they thought they needed, and these did not immediately come, their faith wavered, their courage fled, and a murmuring feeling took possession of them. This, I saw, displeased God. Every saint who comes to God with a true heart, and sends his honest petitions to him in faith, will have his prayers answered. Your faith must not let go of the promises of God, if you do not see or feel the immediate answer to your prayers. Be not afraid to trust God. Rely upon his sure promise, “Ask, and ye shall receive.” God is too wise to err, and too good to withhold any good thing from his saints that walk uprightly. Man is erring, and although his petitions are sent up from an honest heart, he does not always ask for the things that are good for himself, or that will glorify God. When this is so,121 our wise and good Father hears our prayers, and will answer, sometimes immediately; but he gives us the things that are for our best good and his own glory. God gives us blessings; if we could look into his plan, we would clearly see that he knows what is best for us, and that our prayers are answered. Nothing hurtful is given, but the blessing we need, in the place of something we asked for, that would not be good for us, but to our hurt. I saw that if we do not feel immediate answers to our prayers, we should hold fast our faith, not allowing distrust to come in, for that will separate us from God. If our faith wavers, we shall receive nothing from him. Our confidence in God should be strong; and when we need it most, the blessing will fall upon us like a shower of rain. When the servants of God pray for his Spirit and blessing, it sometimes comes immediately; but it is not always then bestowed. At such times, faint not. Let your faith hold fast the promise that it will come. Let your trust be fully in God, and often that blessing will come when you need it most, and you will unexpectedly receive help from God when you are presenting the truth to unbelievers, and will be enabled to speak the word with clearness and power. It was represented to me like children asking a blessing of their earthly parents who love them. They ask something that the parent knows will hurt them; the parent gives them the things that will be good and healthful for them, in the place of that which they desired. I saw that every prayer which is sent up in faith from an honest heart, will be heard of God and answered, and the one that sent up the petition will have the blessing when he needs it most, and it will often exceed his expectations. Not a prayer of a true saint is lost if sent up in faith, from an honest heart. When at Oswego, N. Y., June, 1855, I was shown that God’s people have been weighed down with clogs; that there have been Achans in the camp. The work of God has progressed but little, and many of his servants have been discouraged because the truth has taken no more effect in New York, and there have been no more added to the church. The Messenger party has arisen, and we shall suffer some from their lying tongues and misrepresentations, yet we should bear it all patiently; for they will not injure the cause of God, now they have left us, as much as they would have injured it by their influence had they remained with us. God’s frown has been brought upon the church on account of individuals with corrupt hearts being in it. They have wanted to be foremost, when neither God nor their brethren placed them there. Selfishness and exaltation have marked their course. A place is now open for all such, where they can go and find pasture with those of their kind. And we should praise God that in mercy he has rid the church of them. God has given many of these persons up to their own ways, to be filled with their own doings. An excitement and sympathy now leads them, which will deceive some; but every honest one will be enlightened as to the true state of this company, and will remain with God’s peculiar people, hold fast the truth, and follow in the humble path, unaffected by the influence of those who have been given up of God to their own ways, to be filled with their own doings. I saw that God had given these persons opportunity to reform, he had enlightened them as to their love for self and their other sins; but they would not heed it. They would not be reformed, and he mercifully relieved the church of them. The truth will take effect if the servants of God and the church will devote themselves to him and his cause. I saw that the people of God must arouse and put on the armor. Christ is coming, and the great work of the last message of mercy is of too much importance for us to leave it and come down to answer such falsehoods, misrepresentations, and slanders as the Messenger party have fed upon and have scattered abroad. Truth, present truth, we must dwell upon it. We are doing a great work, and cannot come down. Satan is in all this, to divert our minds from the present truth and the coming of Christ. Said the angel, “Jesus knows it all.” In a little from this their day is coming. All will be judged according to the deeds done in the body. The lying tongue will be stopped. The sinners in Zion will be afraid, and fearfulness will surprise the hypocrites. PREPARE TO MEET THE LORD.
I saw that we should not put off the coming of the Lord. Said the angel, “Prepare, prepare, for what is coming upon the earth. Let your works correspond with your faith.” I saw that the mind must be stayed upon God, and that our influence should tell for God and his truth. We cannot honor the Lord when we are careless and indifferent. We cannot glorify him when we are desponding. We must be in earnest to secure our own soul’s salvation, and to save others. All importance should be attached to this, and everything besides should come in secondary. I saw the beauty of Heaven. I heard the angels sing their rapturous songs, ascribing praise, honor, and glory to Jesus. I could then realize something of the wondrous love of the Son of God. He left all the glory, all the honor which he had in Heaven, and was so interested for our salvation that he patiently and meekly bore every indignity and slight which man could heap upon him. He was wounded, smitten, and bruised; he was stretched on Calvary’s cross, and124 suffered the most agonizing death, to save us from death; that we might be washed in his blood, and be raised up to live with him in the mansions he is preparing for us, to enjoy the light and glory of Heaven, to hear the angels sing, and to sing with them. I saw that all Heaven is interested in our salvation; and shall we be indifferent? Shall we be careless, as though it were a small matter whether we are saved or lost? Shall we slight the sacrifice that has been made for us? Some have done this. They have trifled with offered mercy, and the frown of God is upon them. God’s Spirit will not always be grieved. It will depart if grieved a little longer. After all has been done that God could do to save men, if they show by their lives that they slight Jesus’ offered mercy, death will be their portion, and it will be dearly purchased. It will be a dreadful death; for they will have to feel the agony that Christ felt upon the cross to purchase for them the redemption which they have refused. And they will then realize what they have lost,—eternal life and the immortal inheritance. The great sacrifice that has been made to save souls, shows us their worth. When the precious soul is once lost, it is lost forever. I have seen an angel standing with scales in his hands, weighing the thoughts and interest of the people of God, especially the young. In one scale were the thoughts and interest tending Heavenward; in the other were the thoughts and interest tending to earth. And in this scale were thrown all the reading of story-books, thoughts of dress and show, vanity, pride, etc. Oh, what a solemn moment! the angels of God standing with scales, weighing the thoughts of his professed children,—those who claim to be dead to the world and alive to God. The scale filled with thoughts of earth, vanity, and pride quickly went down, notwithstanding weight after weight rolled from the scale. The one with the thoughts and interest tending to Heaven went quickly up as the other went down, and oh, how125 light it was! I can relate this as I saw it, but never can I give the solemn and vivid impression stamped upon my mind, as I saw the angel with the scales weighing the thoughts and interest of the people of God. Said the angel, “Can such enter Heaven? No, no, never. Tell them the hope they now possess is vain, and unless they speedily repent, and obtain salvation, they must perish.” A form of godliness will not save any. All must have a deep and living experience. This alone will save them in the time of trouble. Then their work will be tried of what sort it is; and if it is gold, silver, and precious stones, they will be hid as in the secret of the Lord’s pavilion. But if their work is wood, hay, and stubble, nothing can shield them from the fierceness of Jehovah’s wrath. The young, as well as those who are older, will be required to give a reason of their hope. But the mind, designed by God for better things, formed to serve him perfectly, has dwelt upon foolish things, instead of eternal interests. That mind which is left to wander here and there is just as well able to understand the truth, the evidence from the word of God for keeping the Sabbath, and the true foundation of the Christian’s hope, as to study the appearance, the manners, the dress, etc. And those who give up the mind to be diverted with foolish stories and idle tales, have the imagination fed, but the brilliancy of God’s word is eclipsed to them. The mind is led directly from God. The interest in his precious word is destroyed. A book has been given us to guide our feet through the perils of this dark world to Heaven. It tells us how we can escape the wrath of God, and also tells of the sufferings of Christ for us, the great sacrifice that has been made that we might be saved and enjoy the presence of God forever. And if any come short at last, having heard the truth as they have in this land of light, it will be their own fault; they will be without excuse. The word of God tells us how126 we may become perfect Christians, and escape the seven last plagues. But they took no interest to find this out. Other things diverted the mind, idols were cherished by them, and God’s holy word was neglected and slighted. God has been trifled with by professed Christians, and when his holy word shall judge them in the last day, they will be found wanting. That word which they have neglected for foolish story-books, tries their lives. That is the standard; their motives, words, works, and the manner in which they use their time, are all compared with the written word of God; and if they come short then, their cases are decided forever. I saw that many measure themselves among themselves, and compare their lives with the lives of others. This should not be. No one but Christ is given us as an example. He is our true pattern, and each should strive to excel in imitating him. We are co-workers with Christ, or co-workers with the enemy. We either gather with Christ or scatter abroad. We are decided, whole-hearted Christians, or none at all. Says Christ, “I would thou wert cold or hot. So then, because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spew thee out of my mouth.” I saw that some hardly know as yet what self-denial or sacrifice is, or what it is to suffer for the truth’s sake. But none will enter Heaven without making a sacrifice. A spirit of self-denial and sacrifice should be cherished. Some have not sacrificed themselves, their own bodies, on the altar of God. They indulge in hasty, fitful temper, gratify their appetites, and attend to their own self-interest, regardless of the cause of God. Those who are willing to make any sacrifice for eternal life, will have it; and it will be worth suffering for, worth crucifying self for, and sacrificing every idol for. The far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory swallows up everything, and eclipses every earthly pleasure. TESTIMONY FOR THE CHURCH.